All This Time
by MakeMineAJacob
Summary: New Moon - If Edward never came back. Bella and Jacobs friendship is strong but things change after one lazy afternoon when Jacob comes to visit. - Hard to explain, must read. Possibility of further chapters if people like.
1. The Food Game

_My First crack at a story so be nice. If anyone does have any suggestions about how they would like to see this story go i would be happy to hear from them, either review or email. I tend to get off track somtimes. Thanks._

A loud knock at the door disturbed my Saturday afternoon "quiet time". I placed my book down on the kitchen counter to go greet whoever was on the other side, but was stopped when the visitor opened the door and came in.

"Why knock if your just going to come in anyway?" I asked matter of factly, placing one of my hands on my hip in order to make my point.

"Just being polite Bells." Jacob answered, grinning mischievously at my stance.

"Yeah well … next time either wait or just come in without knocking." I replied removing my hand and walking back into the kitchen.

"Point taken." Jacob replied, following my lead.

Jacob took his usual position, leaning against the edge of the counter while I placed myself on one of the stools. I marked my page with a bookmark, and looked up at Jacob, "So what are we doing today?"

Jacob looked back at me and sucked in his lips in thought, "Well .. this Christmas weather is pretty bad. It's too cold … for you … to do anything outside. So I thought we could just stay in."

I nodded, "Right okay? Stay in and … "

"Do you know what I've been craving for?" Jacob interrupted suddenly, leaning in closer towards

me, stopping inches away from my face.

"What Jacob?" I replied, no longer taken back by Jakes lack of spacial awareness.

"Pancakes." He replied.

Jacobs hot breath skimmed over my cheeks. "Do you want me to make you pancakes? Is that what your asking?"

Jacob smiled, and pulled back away from me and carried on leaning against the counter, "If your offering Bells." He replied, smiling "his" smile at me.

I rolled my eyes and made my way to the cupboards and began pulling out all the necessary ingredients. As I began preparing, Jacob just stood there, silently doing nothing.

It had been over a year since the Cullen's moved out of Forks. Over a year since I had last seen Edward. Over a year since Jacob had become the only light in my life. All that time had made my friendship with Jacob perfect. Saturday afternoons was my quite time. No school, no work, no Charlie until 5 o'clock. I never minded though when Jacob interrupted it, which he did, every Saturday.

And it was because of "our Saturday" outings that it meant we could stand together in silence, and it wouldn't be awkward. Just perfect.

Jacob suddenly began rustling around in the cupboard next to me. He pulled out the large frying pan and flicked on the stove.

"Jacob Black, am I seeing right. Are you actually assisting me?" I gasped sarcastically.

"Well you were taking so long Bells I thought my stomach was going to implode before I got to the Pancakes." He replied looking at me quizzically.

Obviously my musing over the past had caused my to cook at a slower pace then usual. It didn't help though that Jacobs stupid wolf boy appetite was so demanding.

"I'm so sorry Mr Black. I promise to pick up the pace. Your pancakes will be with you shortly." I replied, snatching the frying pan out of his hands.

He got the point and jumped up onto the counter and returned to sitting in silence.

I threw the lump of butter into the frying pan. I was watching it sizzle and crack when Jacob spoke.

"Have you ever noticed how some food names are really erotic?" He asked, in an honest queried tone.

My face pinched at the odd question, I placed the frying pan down and turned towards him, "What?"

Registering my "what the hell are you on about" response, he jumped of the counter in search for evidence on his statement.

"Well like these …" he stated picking up a box of mince pies. "_Deep filled_ mince pies." He said, reading the label in a seductive voice.

I looked at him in disbelief before saying, "Well yes anything is going to sound erotic when you say it in that voice"

Jacob placed the box down and walked over to me slowly, "Are you saying I have a sexy voice, Bells?"

I blushed slightly, "No, I'm saying that .. you were putting on a stupid seductive voice." I defended, placing my palm against his heavy chest pushing him away so I could return to the stove.

Jacob smirked, "Whatever Bella, you keep telling yourself that." He winked and then made his way back to the cupboards on the high wall and began rummaging around.

I let out a frustrated sigh, "What are you doing know?"

"I'm looking for more food to prove my point." He replied, sticking his head further into the cupboard.

I shook my head and smiled, and poured the first lot of batter into the pan and watched it swirl around the edges and finally settle.

"Aha!" Jacob called, pulling away from the cupboard and presenting another larger box. "_Moist_ Chocolate cake" He read, empathizing the word "moist".

I rolled my eyes, "Really Jake."

"Oh come on Bells, don't tell me your not just a little bit turned on." Jacob replied, with a wink.

"What by Chocolate cake?"

"Or minced pies. Whatever floats your boat."

"You seriously never fail to amaze me." I replied turning back to the stove.

Jacob slowly walked behind me his warm breathed flowing down my neck as he whispered in my ear, "I'm glad I can keep you entertained, Bella"

A shiver travelled down my spine. I wasn't seriously getting turned on by food, was I?

Jacob slumped back onto the counter, grinning, obviously proud of his achievement to render me silent. I continued to concentrate on the stupid pancakes. I flipped the thick pancake over with the spatula and listen to the uncooked side sizzle against the hot pan.

"Hey Bella?" Jacob called over the silence.

"What Jacob?" I growled.

"I see you got some _hard_ candy off your cousin for Christmas."

I slammed down the spatula onto the counter and turned straight to Jacob, "Seriously, you are so weird."

Jacob just laughed , sitting there smiling at me, "Oh, your so cute when your trying to be angry."

"Shut up." I hissed, turning around in order to hide my smile.

I violently scooped up the pancake and shoved It onto a place, then walked over and half threw it onto the counter, "There, your stupid pancakes." I stated, crossing my arms over my chest in annoyance.

"Come on Bells … don't bring the pancakes into this." He winked again.

He sat down and began helping himself to the variety of toppings I had laid out for him. Within ten minutes he had gotten through six big pancakes, and he still let out a disappointed moan when I told him we had run out of batter.

For the rest of the afternoon we just lazed about. Watching TV playing some cards, just typical Jacob/Bella stuff. Everything was so easy with Jacob. He was one of the most simplistic people I had ever met, and that was only because he never hid anything from you. What you saw with Jacob was what you get. It was so refreshing.

We had made it through the afternoon without Jacob mentioning any more erotic food, until at half four when Jacob got up to leave he said, "Oh and Bella, try not to think about that "Moist Cake" to much tonight."

Ugh. Stupid wolf.

The rest of my day was as normal, Charlie came home at five, I made him steak for dinner, we watched some match on TV.

Life was so normal these days. After the Cullen's disappearing act all that time ago there was no more forbidden love or obsessive vampires seeking revenge on me to deal with any more. It had taken a long time for me to be grateful for the normality, but Jacob had filled the deep gaping hole "he" had left behind. The scars still stung every know and again, but never when Jacob was around.

I smiled sheepishly as I trudged up the stairs to my room, calling goodnight to Charlie on the way up. I lazily pulled on my shorts and t-shirt, not realising how tired I actually was. I switched of the lights and climbed into bed, letting out a gentle sigh as the warm quilt securely surrounded me.

For some reason I began thinking back to what Jacob had said before he left today, smiling to myself realising how funny Jake was actually being.

Suddenly another thought crammed its way to the front of my brain, catching me of guard.

_"I'm glad I can keep you entertained Bella."_

An all too familiar shiver ran down my back as I remembered Jacobs hot, sticky breathe moving down my …

"Whoa! Okay, enough of that" I thought to myself, closing my eyes tight in an attempt to push away the memory.

_Moist cake._

"What!" Was I seriously thinking about that stupid Chocolate Cake. I was obviously more tired then

I thought I was. Sleep deprived maybe.

But then those two words kept running through my body, with Jacobs seductive tone carrying them through.

Seriously weird.

I pulled the covers closer up to my neck, trying not to think about Jacobs hot breathe and the now heavy heat that had began creeping up my body.

"Stop it!" I chanted to myself. "It's Jacob, your Friend."

But that didn't help. The heat was filling me. Encouraging me. A feeling I hadn't felt in a long time.

Moments later it had gotten uncontrollable, and there was nothing stopping my shaking hand from travelling down my body and peeling my shorts from off my hips. Minutes later I was on my way, frantically moving my fingers in and out, circling my clit, spreading the heat all over me whilst my other hand kneaded my breast. And all the while I was thinking about Jacob.

Minutes later my body began to shake as the wave overtook me. I bit my lip in order to stifle my groans. I lay there letting the last of the waves crash over me, leaving me satisfied and confused.

Jacob _was _my friend, right?

The next morning I tumbled into the shower, turning the heat up, washing away any memories of last night. The hot water begged for my sleepless body to awaken.

I dried my hair and dressed in my new denim skirt (that Jessica had practically forced me to buy) and a plain white T-shirt, wrapping myself in a thick knitted cardigan. As I made my way down the stairs the voice of more then one reached my ears.

"Look its sleeping beauty." Charlie called from the kitchen, transferring the attention of Billy and Jacob onto me.

I smiled, not daring to look at Jacob.

"To much on your mind last night to sleep?" Jacob called, grabbing my attention and giving me a mischievous grin.

I attempted a smile back, but turned quickly away in order to hide my red cheeks. I felt like I had been caught red handed. Except there was no way Jacob could of know what I had done last night. I made my way over to the coffee maker and slowly poured myself a cup.

"Come on Billy. Kick off is almost starting." Charlie said, wheeling Billy towards the living room, leaving me and Jacob on are own.

I turned towards Jacob, expecting some stupid comment and just waiting to get over it, but something caught me of guard. There was something different about Jacob.

He hadn't had his hair cut, and there wasn't anything unusual about what he was wearing. It was as if I was seeing him in a completely new light. Suddenly Jacob, my best friend was oozing sex appeal. His chest was mesmerizing, the way it moved up and down as he breathed. His eyes, those big brown eyes that had seen me through my darkest days felt as if they could see right into me, right into my desires.

"Bella?" Jacob called, pulling me out of my revelation.

"Mm, what?" I mumbled, looking down into my coffee cup in order to hide whatever expression was plastered across my face.

"I said do you mind hanging out for a bit, I'm really not in the mood for watching a game with the old folks, it's too early for that sort of thing."

I nodded pathetically, and watched Jacobs smile appear at his lips. Lips which I for some reason could not stop starring at.

Jacob then decided that this was the right time to eat an apple. As if I wasn't already confused enough and now I had to watch this person eat a stupid piece of fruit in a way I had never seen before. And as if that wasn't bad enough, seeing the drop of juice escape his bite and watching his tongue scoop it of his lips, could drive a women insane.

And there it was again. That heat. Except this morning it was different. It was real and something else. It felt right, like the something that had been missing from me all this time. Seeing Jacob standing before me now was like flipping over to the back pages of a workbook and seeing that obvious answer you had been searching for all this time.

"Bella. We're going to Billy's instead, the satellites gone down, stupid winter weather. Jake you coming?" Charlie asked appearing in the kitchen.

"No thanks, I'll just stay and hang out with Bella." Jacob replied, turning to me with a smile.

"Okay whatever." Charlie replied already half way through the door.

"So what we doing today then Miss Swan?" Jacob asked, as usual, making his way across the kitchen.

I couldn't speak. How could I when this man was suddenly all I could think about and he was standing right by me.

"Bella?" Jacob asked, a worried expression crossing his face, "What's wrong? Are you okay?"

He looked at me, gently taking my hands in his, quickly searching my face for answers. In that moment the last threads of confusion vanished.

"Kiss me." I replied in a whisper.

Jacobs eyes locked on mine, "What?" he whimpered.

I placed a palm on his hot cheek and guided his head towards mine. Moments later our lips touched, slowly melting. Fitting perfectly like they were meant for each other. My lips parted, inviting him in. Slowly his tongue flicked into mine. We began kissing more frantically, needing each other, making up for lost time. Suddenly his hands found my hips and he pulled me up onto the counter. In the moment my legs straddled him, my thighs urging him closer.

"Bella." He breathed into the crook of my neck, as he laid a trail of kisses down to my shoulder.

Curious hands began searching, Jacobs finding their way to my breasts, mine clinging at his broad back. We held each other, as close as we could, our breathing was erratic, my mind was turning wild. I felt at home in his arms, in **my Jacobs** arms.


	2. The Other

As Jacob found his way back to my lips I felt a moment of complete peace. My usually frantic mind could only think of him, and I felt complete. Things now, were never going to be the same and a bolt of excitement ran through me like electric.

"Bella." Jacob groaned in a rough voice, his face falling to my neck.

I closed my arms tighter around his back, "Jake."

He dug his forehead slightly into my shoulder, "There's something I need to tell you."

"What?" I asked, planting small kisses along his hot neck.

"I … I didn't want you to … you need to know that …"

Jacobs stumbling alarmed me, I pulled away, still holding him close, to face him, "Jacob, what?"

"Edward, he .. he's back … he came back yesterday."

My moment of peace was lost. My forehead began to ache and black haze covered my vision. I felt my control slip away and my limps fell heavily to my side.

"Bella? Bella?" Jake called, taking my face in his palms, a look of total panic appearing on his face.

"He's .." My throat was dry, "He's back?"

"Yes, him Carlisle, all of them. I don't know why, but Quil and Embry saw them yesterday in town …"

"Jake, why did you tell me?" I asked suddenly, not sure why.

"I thought … I didn't want you to find out by someone on the street and I thought you needed to know." Jacob pulled away slightly his head lowering towards the floor. "I'm telling you know, because I know it will change things, and I thought you should know before anything else between me and you happened .. I don't know."

And there it was, laid out before me. Why I had asked the question, the worry at the back of my mind. Would Edwards return affect what moments ago I was clinging onto, never wanting to let go.

"Jacob, I … I don't know if it does." Tears began falling from my eyes, I felt him slip away.

"Bella, I understand. He was …" Jacob let out a frustrated sigh and squinted his eyes in concentration, " He was a big part of you life, I know. Don't worry about anything. I'll just go." He pulled away and began heading for the door.

My body wouldn't move, the shock was still rendering my muscle still. I called out his name but it only escaped as a whisper. He was walking away, my Jacob. My heart pounded.

"Jacob, don't!" I pleaded, my voice finding volume this time.

"Bells, I'll come back. Just think about it. I shouldn't stay. I will come back."

And he left. The door shut and I was left alone. Slowly my body slid of the top of the kitchen counter and onto the floor. A wave of nausea flew over me. My head was pulsing in agony. I needed him back.

The tears came quicker and my body began to shake in between sobs. I sat for what felt like forever, trying hard not to cry.

Suddenly a knock came at the door. Before I could even attempt to stand Alice had already walked in.

"Oh Bella. Bella are you okay?" She asked, frantically checking over my body for injury's, "I had a vision, I came over here as fast as I could, what's wrong?"

I tilted my head towards her, still in shock from her presence. I loved Alice and seeing her for the first time in over a year was a lot to handle, "I … Edward's back … J-J Jacob left... I..."

"Bella what has Jacob done?" She asked with a utterly serious look.

I drew my eyebrows in confusion, "Nothing, Jacobs done nothing wrong. Edward came back, so he left …"

"He hasn't hurt you, are anything like that?"

"No! Why would you think that?" Frustration brewed within me, why was she so quick to blame Jacob for the state I was in. It was Edward I was annoyed at, why return now, just when things felt complete.

"Your upset, why is it that your upset?"

I didn't really know, I felt lonely, scared, rejected, "Why have you come back?"

"The hospital rang Carlisle, they where having some trouble with a previous patient of his. Something about the patients subscription, I don't know, but they wanted him to come and sort it out

if he could. Carlisle thought it wouldn't hurt to pay Forks a visit, plus I haven't had a vision about you in a long time. Not knowing how you where was driving us all mad, especially Edward."

"Alice, take me to him." I demanded suddenly, not knowing why.

"Why Bella? Do you think it's a good idea?"

"Yes it's fine. I need to see him if he's here, please Alice."

She nodded taking me by the hands and gently pulling me to my feet. I grabbed my thick winter coat and headed for the door.

Parked on the house drive was a brand new yellow Porch.

Alice chuckled slightly, noticing my taking back expression as I examined the car she stated, "Edward, a birthday present."

I shrugged, instead of commenting on what a ridiculous present a Porch was. There was no time for small talk as within minutes (thanks to Alice's need for speed) we were at the Cullen's house. Their old house, I guess. I never knew if they had sold on the grand lot, I guess I knew now.

I stepped out the car questioning my visit here. The house look vacant and different but slowly the memory's began flooding back. Before I could run and turn back, Edward had already appeared outside. Alice quickly excused herself and disappeared inside, leaving us alone.

I stared at him speechless, everything had happened so fast and I hadn't had time to prepare myself for this moment. I didn't know what I wanted to say. Surprisingly, I didn't break. I hadn't seen Edward in over a year, the man had left me broken and lost. Seeing him now for the first time didn't evoke the emotions I was sure I would feel.

Edward looked different. I know it was impossible for his physical appearance to change but it was almost as if he had lost his glow. That glow that always seemed to radiate of him, the one that drew me in and kept me memorised by his being. To me now, he just looked like a normal boy, someone I could of known. The only emotion I felt towards him now was slight anger and irritation. What right did he have in returning?

"Bella." He called quietly, closing the gap between his, producing a beautiful smile.

Except the beautiful smile irritated me further.

"How are you Bella?" He asked softly, still smiling.

I continued to stare at him, not knowing what to say. What could I say when there was nothing to say.

"I'm … I'm fine. You know I'm just going to go … good to see you again." I mumbled pulling away turning my back and heading down the drive.

"Wait." He called, chuckling slightly. "Don't you want to come inside. Everyone I know, would love to see you … and well I would love to see you."

Snap. Something inside of me snapped, epiphany flew over me. "Would you Edward? Then why the hell did you leave and choose today, a year after to come see me? You left me hurting like nothing I felt before. Why, why did you leave and not even come back when my world was black?" I gasped for breathe feeling the tears return, "Seeing you now has made me realise that I don't even want to see you again. You were a blip in my life. Your not the same to me any more Edward, and I'm sorry, but you have no one but yourself to blame for that."

With that I turned around again and marched down the drive, leaving him open mouthed and speechless.

I walked quickly out of their drive and began travelling back down the roads that would lead me home. Gradually the tears removed themselves from my face, and freedom replaced the anger. I was free. Free to love who I wanted. Free to be with Jacob without ever thinking about the other.

About an hour later I had crossed the border between Vampire and Werewolf territory, and I continued my walk towards La Push. My legs were heavy and I was exhausted but neither that or the bitter cold air could stop me. I was just grateful that the Black's house was so close to the boarder.

The part just outside La Push was beautiful, thick forest's stretched out forever. The tree tops where still covered with a light dusting of snow that had fallen a few day's ago. I breathed in the fresh winter air as the cold sun hit my face.

Suddenly the ripping sound of a motorcycle pierced the air, seconds later Jacobs black bike came skidding down the road stopping suddenly by my side.

He pulled of his helmet and turned towards me, still sitting on his bike, "It's freezing Bella, get on quick."

"How did you …"

"I'll tell you later, here." He said placing the helmet in my hands, "You need it more then me."

I took the helmet and placed it on my head. I swung my leg over the bike and sat behind Jacob.

"Hold on." He ordered, kicking the bike to life.

I clung my arms around is back and naturally placed my head against his shoulders. His heat was so comforting in the bitter weather. I breathed in his scent as we travelled down the road towards his house. I whispered a thank you realising he had not decided to just take me home.

Minutes later we arrived outside his house. I slid of the bike and Jacob followed. He took the helmet off me and placed it on the floor, he then turned and headed inside.

I could sense that there was something off with him, maybe he knew where I had been. Still, I didn't care because I knew what I wanted now, without a doubt.

I closed the door behind me noticing the empty house, I followed Jacob into the front room and watched him slump into the couch.

"Quill was having a run through the forest and saw you. He thought it was weird that you where walking outside of La Push on your own so he came back and called me. That's how I knew where you were."

I nodded and sat down besides him, "Jake I …"

"Bella …" He interrupted, "It doesn't matter, I understand. You want me to take you back?"

My eyebrows drew in confusion, "What? No. I …"

"You don't need to explain Bella, I know things have changed." He stated turning his gaze away from me.

My breathing increased, "No I do need to explain because nothing has changed." I replied moving closer and taking his face in my palms, forcing his head towards me, "I went to see … him and nothing has changed. I don't know why I went and I know it was stupid but Jake … I can live the rest of my life without seeing him and I know it wouldn't effect me one bit. Jacob I want you, whether he is here or not."

Jacobs eyes searched my face. He looked confused and lost. All I wanted to do was reassure him that everything was okay. That what had happened before at my house still counted. I wanted him back.

I leant forward and kissed him gently on his lips, hoping he would respond. Seconds later his lips kissed back. My heart warmed again, knowing I was home.


End file.
